The Martyr-idation of Dick Cheney
or
Vice President Palooka

Am I the only one who gets nervous and a little bit skeptical when the AP runs an article with an opening line like this:

"WASHINGTON - Vice President Dick Cheney is reaching out to moderate Arab leaders for help in bringing stability to Iraq, a mission that will include pleas for postwar support for minority party Sunnis."












Now, I understand that nobody likes a skeptic…but this is just silly. Reaching out? The last time Cheney reached out and flew in to the Middle East, the Bad Guys tried to bomb him to death. The only thing Cheney has ever plead for - hell, the only thing the man wants, his aids say - is a follow up to the massively successful Greco-style White House Dinner Orgy of 2003.

Cheney couldn’t stop asking for a Second Feast, a thought echoed by many. The only reason the administration hasn’t staged a second coming is due to the risk of another leak. Weeks after the 2003 dinner, journalists found fragments of a disturbingly pornographic transcript from the event. These excerpts were found on a sheet of paper, stuck to the floor in a White House bathroom stall.

“…the lights have dimmed now, and the men, led by Cheney, are disrobing and forming a sort of human pyramid…”

“…electric wires hang from the ceiling, crackling. The smell of burning flesh has filled the halls, somewhere in the distance I can hear Dubya’s laugh, only slower, like a monster…”

“…Jenna Bush, now in stockings and high heels, is giving Lincoln’s portrait a strip tease—licking the paint now, hugging the frame…”

“…Bill Frist dances alone and naked in a corner, but for his belt, which features hundreds of hypodermic needles filled with multicolored liquids and gels. The needles chime like bells as he dances. He is surrounded by a circle of animal bones…”

“…the crescendo of White Rabbit has been playing on an endless loop since the sacrifice…everyone is naked...someone is talking about making online gambling illegal...”

“…heaving their bodies against the walls, the senators screamed as blood and animal fat splattered across the room…”

Expensive dinners/orgies are Cheney’s thing, not international diplomacy. I think the whole thing smells rotten...










So why am I telling you all of this now?

While watching Queen Elizabeth at the White House on CNN, I noticed a truck unloading vats of animal fat and human-sized crates in the background.

The second dinner will soon begin.

It very well may be Cheney's last.

One faux international diplomacy trip
+ one previous assassination attempt
+ one despised administration official
+ one final orgy
+ one trip to the middle east
= Cheney, the American Martyr.

Hated in life. Loved in death.

A martyr for what?

OIL

black gold....Texas tea...you know the stuff...














Somehow...someway...it always comes back to oil. Oil and the fucking Beverly Hillbillies. Oil, the Beverly Hillbillies, and long term religious tension.

You heard it here first.