If a Tree Falls in the Suburbs...
and the houses are 150 yards away from each other, does anyone hear it?
It turns out that there is an answer for this one. T-Ken was working in my parents' basement office when it dropped, I was away at my own office.
He texted me in a panic:
T-Ken: OMFG
ME: ?
T-KenL: Huge azz tree just drpd on your lake!!!!1
ME: Huh?
T-Ken: It was so loud!@!!
T-Ken: I frst think teh bin ladens had hit us again11!
ME: Whtevs...
Now the problem is that suburbanites in our neighborhood will be complaining to the subdivision board within hours about the "unsightly problem" over at 20576.
But that really doesn't matter. There's no way in hell that I'm going to rent a chain saw and break a sweat over this. I can't even fit my arms around the main branch that splits off from the trunk. The thing is fucking huge. Since the parents are in Florida, there's a good chance that this will be here for a couple weeks.
If more than one neighbor stops by our house and politely asks me to remove the eyesore, I'm going to affix a hammock to the fallen branch and lounge around the tree all weekend with a big cooler full of beer, a loud stereo, and every 80's CD compilation that I can find at Best Buy.
Maybe I'll even haul my weight lifting bench onto the yard and do sets in between naps.
...fucking suburban assholes.
Really, though, it looks kind of cool. If hammocks turn out to be too expensive, I may just fell a few more trees around the lake. It would totally start looking like Yoda's swamp.
Totally.
(click images for larger version)
(I haven't heard any complaints yet)
and the houses are 150 yards away from each other, does anyone hear it?
It turns out that there is an answer for this one. T-Ken was working in my parents' basement office when it dropped, I was away at my own office.
He texted me in a panic:
T-Ken: OMFG
ME: ?
T-KenL: Huge azz tree just drpd on your lake!!!!1
ME: Huh?
T-Ken: It was so loud!@!!
T-Ken: I frst think teh bin ladens had hit us again11!
ME: Whtevs...
Now the problem is that suburbanites in our neighborhood will be complaining to the subdivision board within hours about the "unsightly problem" over at 20576.
But that really doesn't matter. There's no way in hell that I'm going to rent a chain saw and break a sweat over this. I can't even fit my arms around the main branch that splits off from the trunk. The thing is fucking huge. Since the parents are in Florida, there's a good chance that this will be here for a couple weeks.
If more than one neighbor stops by our house and politely asks me to remove the eyesore, I'm going to affix a hammock to the fallen branch and lounge around the tree all weekend with a big cooler full of beer, a loud stereo, and every 80's CD compilation that I can find at Best Buy.
Maybe I'll even haul my weight lifting bench onto the yard and do sets in between naps.
...fucking suburban assholes.
Really, though, it looks kind of cool. If hammocks turn out to be too expensive, I may just fell a few more trees around the lake. It would totally start looking like Yoda's swamp.
Totally.
(click images for larger version)
(I haven't heard any complaints yet)
posted by The Youngest at 4:47 PM
3 Comments:
So you have, or haven't received complaints?
That would make a supersweet fort if you just pounded some particle board around the sides, raise the floor up a bit, wire electricity, maybe pound some stakes into the ground and hang skulls from them facing inside.
I'm inspired by the flow of the pictures & the appearance on the actual page. The "preview" version that you can look at NEVER looks like the final.
I am teh sux0r @ b10661n6
- The Youngest
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